WHAT A SAD INDICTMENT of our times, when a father and son cannot enjoy a quiet game of cricket together without attracting the attention of a gang of hooded hooligans, who eventually rounded-off their constant taunting of the pair by killing the father. No – this wasn’t Brixton or Birmingham – but on our own doorstep in ERITH. It is alleged that among this gang of thugs were children as young as ten, which makes this horror story even more horrifying. They had fled by the time the police arrived, possibly hopping onto a bus to take advantage of Mayor Ken’s free travel to terrify passengers with their threatening behaviour. Long gone is the time when children were seen but not heard and respected their elders and those in authority.
And what when they later returned home, assuming there was probably no father to keep them in check? Were doting mothers waiting for them with a tasty meal, before they disappeared to their bedrooms to play the latest expensive video games, or ‘surf the net’ for further victims? Surely someone was aware that these little angels had criminal tendencies. Their schoolteachers must have realised that these were little thugs evolving into bigger ones, although it would come as no great surprise to learn they didn’t bother with school. Neighbours would be aware of who was living next door to them, but would understandably turn a blind eye to protect their own family’s safety and their property.
Shocking isn’t it? How has it come to this, you may ask? Well look no further than the ‘progressive do-gooders’ who banned the cane in schools and revoked corporal punishment in penal establishments. And as for the perpetrators of such vile crimes ending up in the Condemned Cell – forget it! I wonder what those social reformers from the 60’s think now? Do they lay awake at night pondering how their social experimentation has inflicted such shocking retribution upon future generations of children and their victims?
Summer Outing
THE RUSH OF MINISTERS to ‘out’ themselves for smoking cannabis at university created sensational headlines and will make it more difficult to preach to today’s young generation, but I’m personally not too perturbed by these revelations. Few people in their youth have not done something silly which they regret on reaching mature adulthood and this is perhaps best left in the past. If politicians were judged solely on their early hi-jinks, there would be very few candidates left and those that survived selection would be an even more tedious bunch than now.
However, I strongly object to their collective sanctimonious attitude towards the smoking of tobacco by the ‘working classes’, who in the main have not had the benefit of higher education or a privileged lifestyle. The message is clear; cannabis is fashionable, tobacco is disgusting. Cannabis makes you a bright young thing, tobacco – a dull, dangerous, lowly member of society, who must be oppressed at all costs.
These politicians have shown that smoking has more to do with class than health.
TREVOR PHILLIPS is a pain in the neck! He is also chairman of the Equality and Human Rights Commission – that is, unless he has resigned by the time this goes to press. It is alleged he has threatened to because he is at odds with the make-up of Gordon Brown’s new Cabinet. His point being that it should comprise of the ‘correct mix’ of ethnic minority and female members, irrespective of whether they are the best people for the job. Presumably if HE was Prime Minister, each place at the table would have two of each ‘type’, like Noah’s Ark. We are fortunate that our new Prime Minister is blind to all this nonsense and his name is not Noah.
DAVID CAMERON leads a contingent of forty prominent Tory’s on a visit to Rwanda, some 4,000 miles from his flooded constituency in Witney. Blair’s Heir obviously sees himself as a future international statesman, but I don’t think the traditional Home Counties Conservatives will see it that way.
BARONESS YOUNG, Labour Peer and Chief Executive of the Environment Agency, has warned that future water bills will have to rise to pay for extra flood protection, following the recent rainstorms and devastation in parts of the country.
What she hasn’t publicly announced is the £24,000 bonus she has just collected, in addition to her £163,000 salary.
I believe a Peasant’s Revolt is long overdue!
I HAVE THE DUBIOUS ABILITY to see humour in the most bizarre or sad circumstances. Hospitals and funerals have not escaped my attention in the past. Take the awful flooding in swathes of the country during July, when hundreds of unfortunate householders were forced from their homes by a rising tide of filthy liquid from breached rivers and having their personal possessions ruined by this calamity. There but for the Grace of God……..etc.
Yet rather guiltily, I found the coverage by all the TV news channels somewhat ridiculous. Every available principal news presenter was mobilised to the main trouble spots to bring us up-to-the-minute bulletins on the situation. They progressively struggled to vary their reports each time and I continually switched channels for some variety of words. Each of these usual armchair purveyors of news were standing knee-deep in their hastily-acquired new Wellington boots, in raging torrents of water, to bring reality gushing into our living rooms. Their usually impeccable smart suits now replaced by anoraks and duffle coats and minus the benefit of studio lighting and make-up, which all added to the drama of the occasion. And for even more dramatic effect, they took shakily to inflatable boats, whilst wearing compulsory Health & Safety life jackets.
I unreservedly apologise to those poor souls who were victims of this natural catastrophe, but must confess that all this over-the-top excitable presentation of events appealed to my twisted sense of humour; if only to see a normally glamorous studio presenter with uncommonly dishevelled hair, not to mention the Channel 4 girl who had her bottom pinched – all in the line of duty!
BORIS JOHNSON FOR MAYOR. At first glance it seems a preposterous suggestion, considering his penchant for acting the class clown and suffering from foot-in-mouth disease. But pause to consider this possibility and the fact that he is really nobody’s fool. Only a few bright students have managed to win a place at Eton as a King’s Scholar; not everyone gets elected as a member of Parliament and Shadow Minister for Higher Education; few are clever enough to enter the cut-and-thrust of the newspaper industry and hold the elevated position of editor and even fewer are brave enough to seek election as London Mayor. His bravery (or stupidity) also led him to the TV studios when he chaired a topical news quiz, where the panellists took enormous delight in reminding him of his personal peccadillo’s and gaffs, at every opportunity.
It has been said that behind the face of every clown is a serious person and I happen to believe this to be true of Boris Johnson. His c.v. is one that many of us lesser mortals would rightly be proud of. And let’s face it, any MP prepared to give up the safe seat of Henley must surely be very serious about the Mayoral challenge. Ken Livingstone has been at the centre of the London political scene for too many years now and some would say it’s long past time for a change. He has managed to alienate many Londoners’ with his draconian policies that usually means more money coming out of their pockets. So his re-election is by no means a forgone conclusion and if Boris can keep his schoolboy alter-ego in check during the election campaign, there is every chance of him succeeding.
FISH AND CHIPS, once the staple diet of the people, is now a luxury meal due to its high cost. Unless you happen to be a prisoner locked up in the police cells at Halesworth in Suffolk. Instead of pounding the beat, officers are being sent out regularly to the local chippy to purchase take-away meals for their ‘guests’ at a cost of around £700 a week. This conjures up the scene from “Dad’s Army”, when the platoon had rounded up a Nazi U-Boat crew in the church hall and Private Pike is going around asking each one for their preferred fish and chip order, whilst Captain Mainwaring becomes more and more exasperated. This sketch could quite easily be compared with the goings-on at Halesworth Police Station, except being a taxpayer having to foot the bill is no laughing matter.
Let them eat cake, I say.
WINSTON CHURCHILL played an important part in my early life; indeed, I believe that I owe my very existence to him. Yet the new curriculum for Secondary Schools has dropped any mention of him from its history programme.
I can appreciate that as the years progress, it is expedient to replace such subjects as Greek Mythology and Arthurian Legends, because these are now meaningless and few people can relate to them. But to ignore important events and personalities that many of us have experienced during our lifetime, however unpalatable to some, is unforgivable. It may be argued that the curriculum has to make room for new, more appropriate subjects – such as the teaching of Mandarin, Arabic and Urdu, racial integration, climate change and computer science. But this argument is superfluous, now that pupils are staying on at school much longer than previous generations, therefore it is logical that there is far more time available to accommodate these additional subjects, making it unnecessary to squeeze out others of importance.
It is patently clear that those responsible for educating our children are politically motivated and selective in what they want them to learn about this once great country’s past. History is FACT, not something to be cannibalised and manipulated by later generations. Even Germany doesn’t hide its terrible past and includes the period of Nazism and the Holocaust in its schools curriculum. If they can still mention Hitler, then I’m sure we have every reason to remind today’s pupils of the important rôle played by Churchill in Britain’s Finest Hour.
I HAVE QUITE A LONG GARDEN. The number of times I walk to the bottom of it to get something from the shed, then completely forget why I’m there – seems to be happening more often lately. The upside of this is that it gives me some much needed exercise when I eventually remember and have to retrace my steps. So it was reassuring to learn that these mental lapses are quite common. A study by a team of Finnish psychologists discovered that all age groups experience an average of six memory blanks a week. So there you have it – I’m not mad after all!
DON’T PUT YOUR DAUGHTER ON THE STAGE MRS. WORTHINGTON.
That was the advice given in a Noel Coward song in the ‘50’s. Today, wise parents could do no better than guide their offspring into nice, safe, lucrative jobs in a local authority. How about becoming a ‘Carbon Reduction Adviser’ on a starting salary of £30,000 plus the usual perks? In fact any position with the words ‘Climate Change’, ‘Carbon Footprint’, ‘Green Recycling’ in its title will see your kids set up for life because this is now the new religion, especially for those with an ambition to take lots of taxpayers money. Best of all, a job as an ‘Equality and Inclusion Manager’ at £100,000 plus bonus a year. If you aren’t clear what this entails, don’t worry, you soon will be. Successful applicants will be required to spy on the construction firms involved with the Olympics, to ensure they are employing the right number of ethnic, female, disabled and sexual oddity workers. Another job for Noah I’d say!
You’d hardly believe that the Olympic Games is already four times over budget and now stands at £9.3 billion – and still counting. That’s one hell of a lot of Walnut Whips to us London Council Tax Payers, tell Ken Livingstone.